Mamma’s Search Engine!

On February 24, 2011, Mamma Biscuit made her stunning debut onto the blogosphere with her little-engine-that-could blog and since then, she has grown a legion of die hard fans from all around the world! Can you even believe it? From a hard, baby-making life at a puppy mill in Georgia to the good people at Curly Tail Pug Rescue to our family—where her New York City adventure began and continues to thrive!

So as we fast approach the one year anniversary of Mamma’s little corner on the web, we would like to share with you all just how you all got here in the first place! But before we dive in, we must send a big thank you and a pug hug to Anna at Door Sixteen for loving Mamma Biscuit as much as we do and for sharing her world with the larger blogging and tweeting community! Without her initial efforts, Mamma would still be anonymous! With that said, I find it wildly entertaining just how some of you have stumbled upon our little Biscuit Lady throughout your internet travels! Now Mamma’s blog is run by WordPress and everyday, I am incredibly amused by some of the search terms people use to get to their respective/desired places on the Web but end up here—on Mamma’s blog!

Listed below are some of the most entertaining words and phrases that people have plugged into their search engines that got them here:

Moma Bisquit (spelled exactly like that by the way)
L U V Madonna
Gay Muscled Bikers
John Galliano
Juggling Pug Images
Madonna Pugs
I’m So Gay I Poop Rainbows
Marc Jacobs Box
Santa Pug
Eat My Biscuit Baby
Drag Queen With Dog
Mama Travesty Fucking Boy
Pug Snuggie
Suck Me Off Mama
Pug Mushroom
Garabedian Christmas
Tom of Finland Cowboy
Like a Virgin
Pug with Crown
Finnish Christmas Gnomes
Ghetto Christmas Village
Madonna Slut
J’adore Dior
I Got Something to Put in You
Casual Arrogance of Tuesday Weld
Pug in a Pig Suit
Masculine Man Daddy
Tom of Finland XXL
Sonia Rykiel Frizzy Hair
Chubby Drag Queens
Rusty Anchor
Lady Caca
Anna Wintour Looks Like a Frog
Day of the Dead Biscuits
Happy Birthday Daddy
Don’t Go For Second Best Baby
Cyndi Lauper Pug Editorial
The Best Homemade Costumes Pug
La Isla Bonita Dress
What Spooning Position Means
Madonna on MTV
Paws up, Rick Genest
Do Me Hard, Mamma

OK, now pick yourself up off the floor and try to control your laughter because I don’t know whether to laugh uncontrollably myself or to be totally concerned! HOLY SHIT, What a cross section of people! WOW, Mamma really makes the people come together! Can you imagine how much more unintended traffic I’m going to gain just by spelling this list out in this post? Nothing tickles me more than to have some horny pervert sitting in his humid bedroom stumbling upon Mamma’s blog by typing in a phrase like Suck Me Off Mama! What a hilarious sex-kill that must have been for the poor schmuck who ended up here instead of some grainy xtube video of a giant woman named “Mama” sucking some man (or woman) off! I can just envision him, with one hand on his dick and the other pecking away at his keyboard—clicking on this blog and then thinking, WTF!!! What’s even more frightening is that I must have written all of these words at some point in any of Mamma’s numerous posts throughout the year—what does that say about me? Oh whatever! I guess I should be proud of this list! In fact, I know I am and to honor Mamma Biscuit’s one year anniversary, I think we are going to up the ante here by putting these words within this post:

Cocksucker Pug
Muscle Studs with Big Biscuits
Sit on this Biscuit
Fuck Me Biscuit (or Mama, totally interchangeable)

We at the Biscuit household feel that this market needs to be exposed to Mamma Biscuit and her life as a fabulous pug here in NYC! We look forward to an influx of traffic from these horny, sexy people! In the meanwhile, we hope that this graphic post does not scare away any long time readers! The last thing I need is for a Million Moms Against Mamma Biscuit Facebook page to show up anytime soon! If so, I’ll have to get Ellen Degeneres and JC Penny to speak out on behalf of our little gremlin—and we all know who will win that battle!

Enjoy and Happy One Year Anniversary to your favorite pug online!

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16 Responses to Mamma’s Search Engine!

  1. Janet says:

    I’m dying laughing at this!

  2. awww im so proud of the little biscuits! Happy one year anniversary ;)

  3. T-Pup says:

    Happy one year anniversary, Mamma! Long live the queen! xxx

  4. Iris says:

    Liebe Mama,
    happy first Blog Aniversary from your big fan Iris on the other side of the pond. You are one lucky lady to have your daddies, your cozy home and your soft treats….of course, you totally deserve it (as every dog on the planet does…)!
    Viele Grüße,
    Iris

    • The Biscuits says:

      Thank you so much Iris! We love and appreciate your support and we agree, every dog in this world deserves a warm loving home and all the soft-chew treats they can eat! ;-) Most of all, we are so lucky to have her more than she is to have us! Pug Hugs and kisses to you and all of her German fans!
      xo
      Mamma and Family!

  5. Vanessa says:

    “Eat my biscuit, baby”? “Sit on this biscuit”? Oh, Mamma, cover your puggy ears!
    Good to know you’re attracting so many Madonna fans, though! If anyone can rival Mamma for fabulousness, it’s her. (Actually, my Valentine’s gift to my boyfriend was tickets to see her in September! We’ve never seen her live before, so excited!)

    Happy blogiversary!

    • The Biscuits says:

      OMG OMG OMG Vanessa, that’s awesome!!!! Coming from someone who has seen Madonna many times before in concert, you will not be disappointed! She is playing Yankee Stadium 2 days in September. We are seeing her on Saturday the 8th—and you? Thanks for your love and support of Mamma Biscuit! I’m so sorry to hear about the death in your family and we hope you return to blogging again—soon! Mamma is sending you pug hugs and kisses!
      xo
      Mamma and Family!

  6. LOL Hilarious!! I love reading traffic search referrals. Mine are no where near as awesome of those though!! I’m laughing thinking of that guy clicking through and seeing Mamma dressed up as Anna Wintour :)
    Happy blogoversary guys!! Here’s to many more xx

    • The Biscuits says:

      LOL Thanks so much Serena! You’re referral list must be just as ridiculous yet probably not as vulgar as mine! LOL I have been compiling these terms for a while now to write this post and I guess I’ve come to terms with the fact that I AM VULGAR LOL Oh well, I always say that vulgarity….and Drag Queens make the world go ’round! Thanks for your love and support of Mamma Biscuit! I love reading your blog as well and I adore your precious Soda!!!
      xoxo
      The Biscuit Family!

  7. Yey! Happy anniversary. And yey for dog blogs and related stuff. And dogs who like Madonna :) Face licks to the Biscuits.

  8. Marina says:

    I loooooove your blog, been following it for couple of months now, and I have read this post several times. It’s hillarious! LOL
    Thanks for making my day, once again ;-))
    Happy Anniversary!!! ;D

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